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Writer's pictureRaj Hayer
Aug 15, 20223 min read

Don’t treat life like it is a zero-sum game

Updated: Aug 5

Spoiler alert — it’s not — it’s a win-win!



I am no stranger to adversity, open heart surgery and facial reconstruction have taught me resilience and perseverance.


2020 was a new type of adversity to face and while some of the challenges remain, I remain optimistic!


In every aspect of life, personal and professional, I am always grateful for a helping hand or an open door.



Does the zero-sum game really help?

Being competitive can help us be ambitious, achieve more, always strive to be better than our perceived competition. Healthy competition is not a bad thing!


However, a zero-sum game, taken from game theory, is probably the most significant representation of destructive competitive behaviour that is exhibited in today’s small business world.


This unwillingness to support each other, or to see the opportunity in promoting each other, is…baffling.


  • Your market is not necessarily my market

  • Your customers are not necessarily my customers

  • Your goals in life are not necessarily my goals in life


Why do we believe that if “you win”, that means “I will lose”?


Maybe this is not a remnant of 2020, and it is just something we are taught from an early age that we need to unlearn. You winning does not mean I lose. In fact, your winning may indeed show me how to achieve success, because I can follow in your footsteps.



I really enjoyed reading the Tribe of Mentors written by Tim Ferriss, because he collected all these amazing success stories and examined habits that got these people to the end goal!


Meditation was one core principle that stood out to me. The mentorship was the other, and mentorship can come in many forms, from friends, colleagues, even someone perceived as competition. Learning from those that came before you.



These last few months I believe I have proven that an abundance mentality and the win-win strategy is the only way forward.


In the past three months, I have “sold” more services from colleagues than I have my own. Foregoing income to have the best person do the job. I believe in my collaborative partners and so I have no trouble espousing their attributes!




I would rather you win today than neither of us does, and we have more to gain working together than apart.


This abundance mindset has helped me put together a summit I am proud of because it allows experts to share their learnings for women who want to achieve wealth and financial freedom.


Working together can achieve more than working alone

The only thing limited in the world is natural resources. Goodwill, money, friends, connections, collaborations — these are all available in abundance!


I wrote a course about using LinkedIn effectively but really it is about how to effectively and with integrity find your Missing Link, the connections that will help you along your journey.


All that matters, in the end, are connections, and collaborations are the only way forward. I will continue to be grateful to be a supportive step in your journey.


IN OTHER NEWS


  • 🌊 We have yearly retreats, find out more on our Retreats Page! 

  • 🚀 Women and wealth event The Wayfinders Summit is taking place June 18-20, 2025 in Toulouse, France. Look forward to meeting you in person.

  • 💰I’m keen to hear from women with a story about their personal careers and wealth journey. Please email me at raj@tinybox.me if you want to be featured in the book.

  • 🚶‍♀️ I’m hanging out in Munich, walking along the Isar. If you are in Munich, then you can schedule a walk and talk!


Q&A


  • In our Free Skool Community, Mayfly Motivation, you can learn more about life design, and ask me specific questions on the monthly Q&A live video call.

  • In our Paid Skool Community, Mayfly Mastermind, you can learn about wealth creation through monthly expert education calls and monthly coaching calls.

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